Chapter 1
It was the anniversary of something bad.
Thoral Mighty Fist, perhaps the toughest, most mysterious and
manly fighter in all the mystical world of Grome, sat in the Inn of the
Gruesomely Gashed Gnome in a dark corner,
weeping into his tankard of warm ale. He hated ale, especially
when it was warm, although he’d been swilling the stuff since before breakfast.
Now it was well after dinner, and all he’d eaten the entire day was a piece of
dry toast and a couple of olives as black as his mood. He raised his mug for
another bitter sip and the jeweled hilt of the magic broadsword, Blurmflard,
poked him in the side like a reminder of past mistakes. It was awkward to sit
at a table with a broadsword at your belt, but the mighty barbarian had kept Blurmflard
with him at all times ever since the blade was lent to him by his wizard
mentor, Yiz. He even slept with it.
As Thoral sat brooding and trying to adjust his position to more
comfortably accommodate the blade, a twelve-inch-long orange koi fish walked
into the bar on his tail fins. Standing in the entryway, the koi peered around
the crowded, dim interior until his bulging eyes fell on Thoral. The fish
frowned.
At six feet, Thoral was a head taller than most other human
inhabitants of the world of Grome and was so powerfully built that he barely
fit at the heavy wooden table at which he sat. He was dressed pirate-style,
with a black leather vest buttoned over his otherwise bare chest, tight,
plum-colored breeches and knee-high, iron-toed boots. A wide crimson belt bore
the magic sword as well as an assortment of leather and velvet pouches. A less
attractive or more effeminate man would never have been able to pull off such
an outfit, but for Thoral it was no
problem. He had chiseled features and a head of thick, golden
hair that curled to his massive shoulders. The few strands of gray made him
even more handsome–in a seasoned and mature
way, of course. His glorious hair notwithstanding, his most
striking feature was his piercing gaze. So intense, so smoldering was his
stare, that those on the receiving end often felt the need
to look away for fear that they would catch fire. There was no
word in Gromish for the vibrant purple color of his eyes, but they were violet.
The koi contemplated the warrior. Given his charisma, strength
and fighting abilities, Thoral could easily have conquered his own kingdom. But
Thoral didn’t seem to care about that
kind of thing. He mostly liked to drink and fight and brood and
wander around in forests looking at trees. As the fish watched, the mighty
warrior burped. The hot gas seemed to sear his manly nostrils so that he
blinked as his striking violet eyes watered.
Thoral looked up from his drink and squinted around the bar to
see if anyone had noticed his tears and if there was anyone worth fighting. He
failed to detect the fish, who was hidden behind the legs of a passing barmaid.
The other patrons were humans, except a few half-elves and a handful of drunken
gnomes. He could take them all on single-handedly, but he knew from experience
that he’d feel even worse after beating them. Especially the gnomes. It was
better to do nothing, to sit and drink and wish things were different.
Thoral closed his eyes and hunched forward to lay his
tawny-maned head on the table. The rough-hewn planks, though, smelled as if
they had been wiped with a mildew-y rag, so he
sat back up. He fumbled in one of his many belt pouches for the
last of his dried herbs, crushed them between his long, calloused fingers and
inhaled their fading minty fragrance. It wasn’t quite strong enough to clear
the lingering scent of the mildew.
As Thoral sniffled at his mint leaves, the fish sighed. Shaking
his head, he stalked across the sticky floor on his tail fins. The barbarian
noticed him with a wince.
“This is the end, Bradfast,” Thoral grumbled at the fish in his
outlandish accent, his rough voice heavy with melancholy. Thoral tended to
transpose the sounds of v and w and to pronounce th at the
beginning of words as z because he was foreign.
“Here we go again,” Brad commented dryly, leaping up onto the
bench and then the table. He picked his way across the tabletop and stopped
before the warrior. “This isn’t the end,
Thoral. It’s just the beginning…or maybe the middle or
something. The point is, it’s not over. It’s never over until you give up—or
you’re dead.”
“I dost wonder about death,” the barbarian said, as if to
himself. He also used outdated words like dost because he spoke High
Gromish even though most everybody else spoke the low version. This was also
because he was foreign. “Would it truly bring an end? Or just a transition to
another world?”
“You’ve had too much to drink, Thoral,” the fish cautioned. “You
always get morose when you drink. It’s time we get moving. Maybe go on another
adventure or something.”
“I am tired of adventures,” the warrior sighed. “I wish only to
go home.” He burped again, and the fish staggered back, blinking.
“Come on, pal. Let’s get out of here,” Brad suggested, fanning
himself with a fin. “We’ll fight a monster or go on a quest or steal the
jeweled eye from an idol or something. It’ll be fun.”
“My heart is too…” Thoral trailed off. “What is that word that
means when something has substantial weight?”
“Heavy,” the fish supplied. Thoral always had trouble
remembering that one.
“Heavy. Yes. My heart is too heavy for adventure,” Thoral
complained.
“Well, maybe if we pick something really hard, you’ll get
killed,” the fish offered.
“A hero’s death?” Thoral asked, perking up just a bit.
“Yeah, sure. A hero’s death.”
“And then I couldst be done with this world,” Thoral murmured.
“Exactly,” Brad affirmed.
“Then let us go,” Thoral said, “this very instant.” He slammed
his drink down on the table so hard that some of the ale sloshed out of the
tankard, splashing at the fish. The koi danced back, just missing a soaking.
“Up to bed first and we’ll hit the road in the morning,” Brad
countered, stepping around the puddle of spilled drink.
“No, we will leave now.” There was a dangerous edge to the
warrior’s tone that drew the attention of everyone in the room even though he
had not raised his voice. The bar went silent.
“Look, Thoral,” the koi answered, “it’s getting late. I’m tired.
You’re drunk. We could both use some sleep. Let’s not make a rash decision that
might lead to all kinds of unexpected
complications.”
Every eye turned to see the barbarian’s reaction. “We will leave
now,” Thoral insisted. The warrior and the fish stared at each other.
“Be reasonable,” Brad tried again. “Just give me one good reason
why we shouldn’t wait
until morning.”
“We will leave now,” the barbarian declared, “because I am
Thoral Mighty Fist!”
Everyone gasped. Brad sagged, defeated. Once Thoral noted that
he was Thoral, there was no point in arguing further. Everyone knew it. That’s
just how it was.
With that, Thoral drained his pewter tankard and crushed it
one-handed. He got unsteadily to his feet, massive muscles rippling under
sun-bronzed, battle-scarred skin, and
transferred Brad from the tabletop into a belt pouch. Then he
tossed a gold coin to the hideously disfigured gnomish innkeeper to pay for the
mug he’d ruined even though it couldn’t have been worth more than a few
coppers. The gnome had been engrossed in restocking a spice rack over the bar,
so the coin struck him in the head and then clattered to the floor. He stepped
on it with his clubfoot before it rolled away and then pinched it between his
stubby, ring-clad fingers.
“Many thanks, Fist Wielder,” the innkeeper croaked, his one eye
glittering from his gashed face as the warrior strode past him. “Where are you
headed now? Not to the Godforsaken
Swamp, I hope. You should steer clear of that place for a while.
There is nothing there but death.”
“I am eager for it,” the barbarian whispered as he strode past
the gnome, who frowned and wrung his tiny hands.
Thoral staggered from the bar into the dark, filthy street.
Although it was well past sundown, the city was still bustling with all kinds
of criminals and cutthroats and that sort of
riffraff. They all cleared out of the big barbarian’s way. Three
figures, cloaked and hooded in the black robes of the Bad Religion, watched
from the shadows as Thoral went to the tavern’s
hitching post to untie his massive tiger-striped steed, Warlordhorse.
He fumbled with the knot, his fingers clumsy from the ale. He shook his head
and tried again.
“Let us attack now,” the leader of the Dark Brothers whispered.
“We will take him unawares.”
“Uh…are you sure?” one of his subordinates asked, his voice quavering.
“Have you heard the stories about him?”
“We have our orders,” the leader countered tersely. “Besides, he
is inebriated, there are three of us, and we have the ultimate advantage…” He
trailed off, sliding a dagger from a fold of his robe. The curved blade was
slick with oily, black poison. He leered at his minions for a moment, and they
reluctantly drew their own poison-coated daggers. The three of them started
toward the barbarian while he was distracted.
Thoral was still having no luck with Warlordhorse’s tether, and
grew frustrated. He put his face close to the rope, trying to get a better look
in the dim light of the moon, and made
another attempt. The Dark Brothers crept closer, raising their
poisoned blades in unison. Just one scratch and Thoral would be paralyzed
before he even felt the wound. Agonizing death would follow within hours, but
not before they had had time to drag the warrior before the master of their
order to find out how much Thoral knew of their plans.
The Dark Brothers closed
in on the unsuspecting champion, swift and silent as death itself.© 2016 Jim
Hardison
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